Hey! It's been a while since you saw my face
I haven't been doing so great
So I took a little break
A lot of people are saying some things about me that aren't quite true
Sanderlei Silveira - 30/06/2023 - BR X
Hey! It's been a while since you saw my face
I haven't been doing so great
So I took a little break
A lot of people are saying some things about me that aren't quite true
Doesn't matter if it's true, though
Just as long as it's entertaining to you, right?
You guys having fun?
[Chorus]
All aboard the toxic gossip train
Chugging down the tracks of misinformation
The toxic gossip train
You got a one-way ticket to manipulation station
Toxic gossip train
Tie me to the tracks and harass me for my past
Those rumors look like facts if you don't mind the gaps
I won't survive in the crash, but hey
At least you're havin' fun
[Spoken]
Uh, hi, everyone
I've been wanting to come online and talk to you about a few things
Um, even though my team has strongly advised me to not say what I want to say
I recently realized that they never said that I couldn't sing what I wanna say, so
Here I am, and, um, today I only wanna talk about the facts
So, I hope that you'll be willing to listen
Here we go
Many years ago, I used to message my fans
Uh, but not in a creepy way like a lot of you are trying to suggest
It was more of a loser kind of way
Where I was just trying to be besties with everybody
It was kinda like, uh, when you go to like a family gathering, you know?
And there's a weird aunt there who keeps coming up to you and going like "Hey, girl, what's the tea!"
And you're like "Ehhh"
Um, that was me, but in group chats with my fans, it was weird
[Verse 1]
I've been sharing my life online for over 15 years
I've poured my heart out to you and because of that I feel
Like I'm talking to my friends, but, in the beginning of my career
I didn't really understand that maybe there should be some boundaries there
There were times in the DMs when I would overshare
Details of my life, which was really weird of me
I haven't done that for years, you see
Because I changed my behavior, and I took accountability
[Spoken]
But that's not very interesting, is it?
[Chorus]
So let's go on the toxic gossip train
The locomotive's fueled with hateful accusations
The toxic gossip train
Steamroll over someone's reputation
Toxic gossip train
Hop on board, but close your eyes, otherwise you'll realize
That the train is made of lies and that person you despise
Maybe didn't deserve to die
But hey, at least you're havin' fun
[Spoken]
In all seriousness, I do think it's really important to hold people accountable for their mistakes
Um, y'know, we should hope that everyone can learn from their mistakes
And grow, and change their behavior, and be a better person
This is something that I've always tried to do when I make mistakes
And is something that I will continue to try t- what?
Oh, you don't care? Oh, okay
[Verse 2]
I thought you wanted me to take accountability
But that's not the point of your mob mentality, is it? No
Your goal is to ruin the life of the person you despise
While you dramatize your lies and monetize their demise
[Spoken]
Yeah, um, I feel like I can already hear the comments on this video
She's gaslighting, manipulating!
Ugh, she's a narcissist and a rat!
I would never make a mistake like that.
[Verse 3]
Oh, I'm sorry I didn't realize
That all of you are perfect, so please, criticize me
Bring out the daggers made from your perfect past
And stab me repeatedly in my bony little back
I'm sure you're disappointed in my shitty little song
I know that you wanted me to say that I was 100% in the wrong
Well, I'm sorry, I'm not gonna take that route
Of admitting to lies and rumors that you made up for clout
[Verse 4]
Hey everybody, I found someone new to harass
She did some things that I do not like, in her past
So everybody, gather 'round, 'cause we're about to attack
But not based on facts, oh no
Your loaded lethal weapon is your fingers on the keys
You don't need any armor when you can hide behind a screen
So, shoot me down, quick, with a click, and bam
My reputation's deceased
[Spoken]
Uh, I also wanted to take a minute to talk about that girl, Miranda Sings
You know the one, yeah her
Uh, she's PG-13, it says that on my website
[Verse 5]
And it's always been that way
And that's why you won't find my videos on the YouTube Kids app
Anyway, um, I didn't realize it was my responsibility
To decide what was appropriate for every kid to see
I've always relied on parents to decide if they're comfortable
With their families watching my YouTube videos or coming to my live shows
Now, have I made some jokes in poor taste? Yes
Have I made lots of dumb mistakes? Yes
Am I sad that there's some fans that feel betrayed? Yes
But was my intention to manipulate? No
[Spoken]
It doesn't really matter what my intention was
Cause it seems as though everyone's already decided on that
Let me tell you, it's not very fun to have millions of people all over the world
Call you the most vile, horrendous, disgusting, life-ruining words
That a person can be called, in my opinion
Um, it doesn't matter that these things aren't true
Uh, everyone just believes that you are the type of person who manipulates and abuses children
So, I just wanted to say that, um
The only thing that I've ever groomed is my two Persian cats
I'm not a groomer, I'm just a loser
[Verse 6]
Who didn't understand I shouldn't respond to fans
And I'm not a predator even though a lot of you think so
Because 5 years ago, I made a fart joke
So, even though I know this video won't change anyone's mind about me
I still felt it was important to come on here and defend myself a little
And take accountability
And I also wanted to say that
To anyone out there who has ever supported me in any capacity
[Spoken]
I really, really appreciate you, thank you
For what it's worth, I never had any bad intentions
But I do feel like shit
[Chorus]
The toxic gossip train
Chugging down the tracks of misinformation
Toxic gossip train
You got a one way ticket to manipulation station
Toxic gossip train
You tied me to the tracks and harassed me for my past
Rumors look like facts when you don't mind the gaps
I won't survive in the crash, but hey
Hope you had some fun
[Spoken]
Actually, y'know, I feel like maybe I should let you guys know something, um
Seems like, maybe you're confused about something? I don't know
Let me try to help, um
[Outro]
Sometimes people make a mistake and it doesn't make them a horrible person, whoa
Sometimes people can make a mistake and they're still a good person
Crazy, I know
Sometimes people can make a mistake and you don't have to take that mistake, oh no
And twist it up, and grind it, and add some lies to it, and pulverize it
And stab it with knives, and ruin a life, and, oh no
Sometimes people can make a mistake, it doesn't mean you gotta send them hate, oh no
Sometimes people can make a mistake and you can kindly let them know, and help them to grow
Sometimes people make mistakes, simply because they made a mistake?
And that mistake doesn't make them a terrible human
It just makes them a human
[Spoken]
But what do I know?
Fuck me, right?
Hey! Yuzimni ko'rganingizdan beri bir muncha vaqt o'tdi
Men juda zo'r qilmadim
Shunday qilib, men ozgina tanaffus oldim
Juda ko'p odamlar men haqimda juda to'g'ri emas demoqda
Bu haqiqat bo'lsa ham muhim emas
Sizga ko'ngil ochayotgan bo'lsa, to'g'rimi?
Siz yigitlar dam olishyapsizmi?
[Xor]
Hamma toksik g'iybat poezdi
Noto'g'ri tavsiflash yo'llarini ochish
Toksik g'iybat poezdi
Siz manipulyatsiya stantsiyasiga bir tomonlama chiptangiz bor
Toksik g'iybat poezdi
Meni yo'llarga bog'lab, o'tmishimga xalaqit bering
Agar siz bo'shliqlarga qarshi bo'lmasangiz, bu mish-mishlar faktlarga o'xshaydi
Men avtohalokatda omon qolmayman, lekin hey
Hech bo'lmaganda siz kulgili emassiz
[Og'zaki]
Uh, salom, hamma
Men Internetga kirishni va siz bilan bir nechta narsalar haqida gaplashmoqchi edim
Um, mening jamoam menga nima demoqchi bo'lganimni aytmaslikni maslahat bergan bo'lsa ham
Yaqinda men ular hech qachon aytmagan narsani aytolmasligini aytmaganman, shuning uchun men aytmoqchiman
Men va um, bugun men faqat dalillar haqida gapirishni xohlayman
Shunday qilib, siz tinglashga tayyor bo'lishingizga umid qilaman
Qani boshladik
Ko'p yillar oldin, men muxlislarimni xabar qilardim
Uh, lekin siz juda ko'p siz juda ko'p siz taklif qilmoqchi
Bu ko'proq yutqazish turidir
Men shunchaki hamma bilan yaxshi bo'lishga harakat qildim
Bu, u erda, uh, oilaviy yig'ilishga borganingizda, bilasizmi?
Va u erda sizning oldingizga boradigan g'alati xola bor va "hey, qiz, choy nima!"
Va siz "ehsh" kabisiz
Um, bu menman, lekin muxlislarim bilan guruhlar chavandozlar, bu g'alati edi
[1-oyat]
Men 15 yildan ko'proq vaqt davomida o'z hayotimni Internetda baham ko'rdim
Men yuragimni sizga quydim va men o'zimni his qildim
Do'stlarim bilan gaplashayotganim kabi, lekin mening kareramning boshida
Men u erda ba'zi chegaralar bo'lishi kerakligini aniq tushunmadim
Mo'minlarga badallari bo'lgan paytlar edi
Hayotimning tafsilotlari, bu juda g'alati edi
Men buni yillar davomida qilmadim, ko'rasiz
Men xatti-harakatlarimni o'zgartirdim va men javobgarlikni oldim
[Og'zaki]
Ammo bu juda qiziq emas, shundaymi?
[Xor]
Shunday qilib, toksik g'iybat poezdiga boraylik
Lokomotivning nafratli ayblovlar bilan bog'liq
Toksik g'iybat poezdi
Kimningdir obro'sini kuchaytiradi
Toksik g'iybat poezdi
Kengashga hop, lekin ko'zingizni yuming, aks holda siz tushunasiz
Poezd yolg'ondan va siz nafratlanadigan odamdan qilingan
Balki o'lishga loyiq emas
Lekin men hech bo'lmaganda siz kulgili emassiz
[Og'zaki]
HAMMA jiddiylikda, men odamlarni xatolari uchun javobgar bo'lish juda muhim deb o'ylayman
Um, Y''lum, hamma xatolardan saboq olishiga umid qilishimiz kerak
Va o'sadi va ularning xatti-harakatlarini o'zgartiring va yaxshiroq odam bo'ling
Bu men har doim xato qilganimda nima qilishga harakat qildim
Va men nima qilishni davom ettirishni davom ettiraman?
Oh, sizga ahamiyat bermaydimi? Oh, mayli
[2-oyat]
Men hisobdorlikni olishimni xohlardim deb o'yladim
Ammo bu sizning olomon mentisligingizning nuqtai nazarimi emasmi? Yo'q
Sizning maqsadingiz - mendan nafratlanadigan odamning hayotini buzish
Yolg'oningizni dramatik ravishda dragizatsiya qiling va ularning ishdan bo'shatsangiz
[Og'zaki]
Ha, um, men ushbu videodagi sharhlarni eshitgandek his qilyapman
U Lug'atni boshqaradi!
Ugh, u narkisist va kalamush!
Men hech qachon bunday xato qilmayman.
[3- oyat]
Oh, men tushunmaganim uchun uzr so'rayman
Barchangiz mukammal ekanligingizni, iltimos, meni tanqid qiling
Sizning mukammal o'tmishingizdan qilingan xanjarlarni olib keling
Va meni bir necha marta suyak bilan qoqing
Ishonchim komilki, siz mening shittimdan hafsalasi pir bo'lgansiz
Bilaman, siz meni 100% noto'g'ri deb aytishni xohlashingizni bilaman
Xo'sh, uzr so'rayman, men bu yo'lni olib ketmayman
Yolg'on va mish-mishlarga tanqid qilish
[4- oyat]
Hey hamma, men kimdirni ta'qib qilish uchun yangi topdim
U men yoqtirmaydigan narsalarni, o'tmishda ham qildi
Hujum qilmoqchi bo'lganimiz uchun hamma narsa, "dumaloq" yig'ing
Ammo faktlarga asoslanmagan, yo'q
Sizning yuklangan halokatli qurol - bu sizning kalitlardagi barmoqlaringiz
Ekran orqasida yashiringaningizda sizga qurol kerak emas
Shunday qilib, meni pastga tushiring, tez, bosma va bam
Mening obro'si mening marhum
[Og'zaki]
Uh, men ham bu qiz haqida gaplashish uchun bir daqiqa vaqt ajratishni xohlardim, Miranda
Siz uni bilasiz, ha, ha
U, u PG-13, bu mening veb-saytimda aytadi
[5- oyat]
Va har doim shunday bo'lgan
Va shuning uchun siz YouTube bolalar ilovasida videolarimni topa olmaysiz
Baribir Um, men bu mening zimmamda ekanligini anglamadim
Har bir bolani ko'rish uchun nima kerakligini aniqlash
Men har doim ota-onalarga qulayligini aniqlash uchun qaror qildim
Ularning oilalari bilan youtube videolarimni tomosha qilish yoki jonli shoularimga kirish
Endi men kambag'al ta'mga bir oz hazil qildimmi? Ha
Men juda ko'p soqov xatolarga yo'l qo'ydimmi? Ha
Xo'sh, xiyonat qilayotgan ba'zi muxlislar borligini achinamanmi? Ha
Ammo manipulyatsiya qilish niyatim edi? Yo'q
[Og'zaki]
Bu mening niyatim nima ekanligini ahamiyatsiz emas
Chunki hamma buni allaqachon hal qilgandek tuyuladi
Sizga aytaylik, bu butun dunyoda millionlab odamlarni bo'lish juda qiziqarli emas
Sizga eng yomon, dahshatli, jirkanch, hayotni buzadigan so'zlarni chaqiring
Biror kishini chaqirish mumkin, deb o'ylash mumkin
Um, bu narsalar haqiqat emasligiga ahamiyat bermaydi
Uh, hamma siz bolalarni manipulyatsiya qiladigan va suiste'mol qiladigan shaxs ekanligiga ishonishadi
Shunday qilib, men shunchaki demoqchi edim, Umid
Men boqgan yagona narsa - bu mening ikki forsiy mushuklarim
Men shunchaki oddiy emasman, men shunchaki yutqazaman
[6- oyat]
Men muxlislarga javob bermasligimni tushunmaganman
Va men siz juda ko'p deb o'ylagan bo'lsa ham, yirtqich emasman
5 yil oldin, men adtli hazil qildim
Shunday qilib, men ushbu video men haqimda hech kimning fikrini o'zgartirmasa ham
Men hali ham bu erga kelish va o'zimni ozgina himoya qilish juda muhimligini his qildim
Va hisobdorlikni oling
Va men ham buni aytmoqchi edim
Har doim meni har qanday qobiliyatda qo'llab-quvvatlagan har kimga
[Og'zaki]
Men haqiqatan ham sizni qadrlayman, rahmat
Bu nimaga arziydi, men hech qachon yomon niyat qilmaganman
Lekin men o'zimni shit kabi his qilaman
[Xor]
Toksik g'iybat poezdi
Noto'g'ri tavsiflash yo'llarini ochish
Toksik g'iybat poezdi
Siz manipulyatsiya stantsiyasiga bir yo'l bor
Toksik g'iybat poezdi
O'tmish uchun meni yo'llarga bog'lab, meni ta'qib qilding
Mish-mishlar kamchiliklarga qarshi bo'lmasangiz, faktlarga o'xshaydi
Men avtohalokatda omon qolmayman, lekin hey
Umid qilamanki, siz juda qiziqarlisiz
[Og'zaki]
Aslida, y''lum, ehtimol men sizga yigitlarni bilishimga ruxsat berishim kerak, ehtimol men sizga biron bir narsani bilishim kerak
Ehtimol, siz biron bir narsa haqida chalkashib ketganday tuyuladimi? Bilmadim
Menga yordam berishga harakat qilaman
[Ortiqcha]
Ba'zan odamlar xato qilishadi va bu ularni dahshatli odam qilmaydi, Ua
Ba'zan odamlar xato qilishlari mumkin va ular hali ham yaxshi inson
Aqldan ozgan, bilaman
Ba'zan odamlar xato qilishlari mumkin va siz bunday xatoga yo'l qo'ymaslik kerak
Va uni bog'lab, maydalang va unga yolg'on ayting va uni to'kib tashlang
Va uni pichoq bilan qoqing va hayotni buzadi, va yo'q
Ba'zan odamlar xato qilishlari mumkin, degani emas, ular sizni nafratni yuborishingiz kerak emas, yo'q
Ba'zan odamlar xato qilishlari mumkin va siz ularga g'amxo'rlik qilishingiz mumkin va o'sishga yordam berishingiz mumkin
Ba'zan odamlar xato qilishgani uchun xato qilishadimi?
Va bu xato ularni dahshatli inson qilmaydi
Bu shunchaki ularni inson qiladi
[Og'zaki]
Ammo men nima bilaman?
Fuck meni, to'g'ri?